- A Trial in The Ministry of Humor Regulation
Bureaucrat: “Law code #1 of the Ministry: May it hereby be known, that, according to the latest state regulations, all manifestations of so-called ‘humor’ and ‘caricature’ are to be directed from the government and the government alone. We support all freedom of expression, including satire. Those from non-governmental origins are outlawed because they don’t get enough laughs. For that, we sentence you to being on the government’s public board of shame tomorrow. Maybe then you’ll learn what true satire is.”
Guilty Defendant: “But, what have I done? Is the role of satire not to allow people to see the problems of society? I’ve informed them about everything…everything! They know what’s wrong now! They can help you solve the problem!”
Bureaucrat: “No. Your satire is evil. It makes people think the wrong thoughts. We need laughs, not wrong thoughts. This is because only we are right. You do not challenge the unchallengeable truth. Don’t go there, child, don’t go there…”
- Can it really be silenced?
A few years ago, the government rolled out a new plan known as “Irony credits.” Satire causes problems, after all, to the omnipotent, omnibenevolent and omniscient state. Each comrade in society must “offset” their ironic statements with sincere, deserved community hours. Each comrade also had a quota that they had to fulfill. After you ran out, you could no longer speak satirical thoughts.
This plan worked for a little while, and community service hours drastically increased. Not after long, however, people began to run out of credits for good. But you can’t end satire. After noticing that the government had predicted every possible piece of satire ever through their ground-braking AI program, people began to use a simple, white piece of paper to show their satirization. The government banned it almost immediately. Then they turned to using milk, which was also quickly outlawed.
After many cycles of this, the people elected to use all words with vowels as satire—unsurprisingly, that was banned as well.
Myb ths str thng sn’t so slss ftr ll.
- Descriptions from the Museum of Misinterpretation
The National Museum of Misinterpretation is a space for all the members of state to understand how dissidents have used satire to misinterpret truth. Here are a few examples:
- Students in School District 451 made signs saying “no more war” during the defense of our great nation. Many have taken this to mean that they want no more war. This is objectively untrue. They want more war. It’s true because we said it.
- People once blocked the road in mass “protests” against rising food prices. Many think that this is because they don’t like the rising food prices. That’s not true. They really blocked the road to show their love for our glorious state. It’s true because we said it.
What these people are saying is objectively untruth. They don’t understand the one and only true interpretation behind these historical acts.
Remember, readers, satire is only for jokes and laughs. It has absolutely no purpose for promoting any beneficial social change, whatsoever. This is true because we said it.
